Is it "You have to" or "You WANT to?"

This letter dates from 1/27.

First off, the inversion here is terrible! The air quality stinks and it is making my breathing really difficult. Half of the time it is CODE RED which is when small children and older people are advised to stay inside because it wouldn't be well for them to inhale it. Well, we are extremely lucky to have a car to get around in. But, with that said.. There still are times I am exposed to the air and the doctor that I went to this week said that the air doesn't like me and I don't like it very much either. She had me get an X-Ray of my chest to see how my lungs and heart are doing. She also prescribed to me an inhaler that I can use in emergencies! So I think I more so have excersize enduced asthma, but it still stinks :( I am doing better though! Also, I had an infection in my toe from the surgery I had in the MTC to have the ingrown toenail removed.. well it had got infected again and the antibiotics I was taking were making me feel awfully terrible. I only have about 3 more to take. They just have made me super groggy, headache always, and then the air and my breathing on top of that was making me.. haidihkiuauegiu. Yeah, I wasn't feeling all that well. BUT! My District Leader gave me a blessing for the sick and afflicted. All of the Elders in my district stood in on the blessing as well and let me tell you, I have been feeling a ton better. I am SO grateful for the priesthood having been restored once again, to bless me and heal me if I truly believe it can happen! So I am great now and we are getting back into the swing of things.. Also, my companion Sister Wight has been treating me so well and learning how to be so motherly to me. It's sweet :)

 

So since we didn't get a lot done this week, The Lord has blessed us immensely! So we had someone call us a little over a week ago and say they have someone who is ready to take the lessons.. WE WERE SO STOKED!! haha we answered saying, " Say that one more time?!" So that was a blessing in itself from over a week ago and then this past week on Wednesday we were able to meet with her for the first time. We taught her Lesson 1, The Restoration! It was my first time inviting someone to be baptized! And guess what, it was grrrrreat! She said yes! She's been prepared from day one to have met with us and the Lord truly knows the desires of her heart. We asked if she would read the Book of Mormon and she said, "I am actually on 2 Nephi 18." What? How does that happen?!! I asked her how she felt about the Book of Mormon and she said, "I now know what I have been missing from my life. This is what fills the void I had and she said she knows the church is true!" The Lord's hand has truly been shown in her life and in our lives as her missionaries! Miracles are happening left and right. She is praying to know if Feb. 15th is the date Heavenly Father would like her to be baptized! We are meeting with her again this week.

 

Also! We have transfers this week.. Most likely since Sister Wight is training me for another transfer, we probably are staying here in Sandy and not going anywhere! But the Lord is mysterious and works in funny ways sometimes! So who knows! I'll keep you all posted :)

 

So we sang in two Wards this past Sunday and talked in one of them about Missionary Work. I was able to share my conversion story and Sister Wight talked about finding courage and hope in yourself to be a member missionary to those you live around and are friends with. So many people walked up to us and said how touching our talks were to them and then our singing.. Oh my gosh, Sister Wight has a beautiful voice too! AND the two of us together, it's just absolutely amazing.. Everyone was saying, "does your Mission President know how good you two sound together?!" That surely is a blessing too that we are able to make beautiful music together and change lives in doing so. Remember that Heavenly Father has blessed us with talents to in return bless other's lives! If you aren't sure about your talent, pray and ask Heavenly Father and he will make them known unto you! But honestly, it was awesome being able to pump up the members in the wards! They are really starting to catch the wave of hastening the work of salvation!!

 

The Fort Lauderdale Temple open house is soon! I expect that someone from the Ward can go to that and let me know how it goes! Although it is quite a drive.. but if you feel prompted to do so, DO IT! And invite family and friends to come as well. It's perfect to learn about the things we do in the Temple and to see how beautiful they are!

 

So one thing I have learned is that in order for me to become a better missionary, the missionary that Heavenly Father has called me to be, I must give all of myself to this work. This instead of me saying, "I have to wake up and I have to workout and I have to study.." It should be, "I want to wake up and I want to workout and I want to study!" This is how my heart will change and be able to better serve the Lord, thus serving His precious children. You all should read "The Fourth Missionary" by Lawrence E. Corbridge. It isn't just for missionaries out on a mission, but for us all. We are all missionaries! Just look it up on google :)

I have learned it's not just about obedience and worthiness, don't get me wrong because that is definitely a form of godliness! But, it's completely surrendering my will to the Father.. Elder Corbridge says:

 

"Just give it up. Surrender your will to Him. Unconditionally. Witholding nothing. Turn it all over to Him; all of your desires, wishes, ambitions, dreams and hopes. Be true and faithful in your head and in your heart, not just in your behavior. Trust in Him. Trust Him who knows all things. Trust Him who has all power. Trust him whose love for you is perfect. Trust Him, who alone suffered, paid and atoned for your sins, and for your weaknesses as well. Trust Him that He will make of you, immeasurably more than what you will ever, ever, in all eternity, make of yourself. He will create of you a masterpiece. You will create of you only a smudge. You will create an ordinary man; he will create a God" (pg 28).

 

He then goes into talking about the parable of the 10 Virgins.. 5 of them were prepared to enter into the Lord's presence and 5 were not. He goes on saying that it's interesting that The Lord used the metaphor "virgins" and not ten maids or ten servants.. What does virginity even imply? Purity. "There were ten worthy, pure maidens and yet five did not enter His presence, despite their worthiness. Why not? He (The Lord) said to them: "Verily I say unto you, I know you not." (New Testament, Matthew 25:12)

 

Obdeince and Worthiness are essential, but they are only but a few qualities of godliness. It's not all of it! Elder Corbridge says that the central question isn't necessarily, "are you worthy, pure or clean?" But, "who are you and who are you becoming?"

 

I love you all! Glad I was able to share my experiences with you. Being a missionary is far more difficult than I ever had imagined. Elder Larrabbe and Gillan made it seem super easy.. But I now understand how much work they put into it and how much they prayed for me and thought about me. It's a blessing to now be on the teaching end. And although I have a lot to work on, as do we all, the Lord will bless me as I come to Him humbly saying, "I simply cannot be who you want me to be without you. I can't get through what life is going to throw at me unless I surrender all that I have to you. I need you. My will isn't going to get me through this experience here on Earth, it's Yours."

 

Have a beautiful week! Stay positive and rely on Heavenly Father in all that you think, say, and do!

 

With never ending love,

 

Sister Garretson